I hope mine doesn't look like that
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Randomize
