remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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