So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
I got her a Nickelback box set.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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