a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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