never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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