i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Randomize
