Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
