smell my finger.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize