How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
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