I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
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