You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
