I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
