I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
