True but thats because hes a fetus.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
He passed out mid-signature
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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