kristin has been a bad kristin
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
