If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize