you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
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