I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
