I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
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