thus making me awesome and them whores
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
