My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun