I'm going to jail i love you
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
then he tried to convert me to islam
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I have feelings that need drinking.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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