There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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