We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
