The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
