we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
