Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Randomize
