I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
This toilet bowl is my home.
Randomize
