I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
