there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize
