I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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