so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
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