Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
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