Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
