I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize