the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
