I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
He kissed a someone with a penis
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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