Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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