i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
