garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize