i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Randomize
