Midget sex pt 2 tonight
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
We left an ass print on the piano.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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