take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Randomize
