Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Randomize
