Buhtt sex?
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Randomize
