ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
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you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
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At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
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