I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Randomize
