Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
