There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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