We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize
